Chamber of Retrospection

Pre-amble: The original Chamber of Retrospection seems to be getting a little crowded. So, here is another room.

Thoughts formed on 20 June 2002
It's been almost 8 months since I was last here. Time really flies. Time has been flying faster than before. I wonder why. Maybe, my life is more satisfying now? Well, I don't seem to have any major complaints about my life at the moment anyway.

I think that is something we all experience. When we are having fun, time flies. When we are miserable, time slows to a crawl. I think this is a universal experience. Strange but true. I hope all of us will have time flying by then. Life might seem shorter but more satisfying for us all if this line of thought holds true.

I think the trick might be in finding things to do to occupy our time with. I don't mean just anything. They have to be things that we find meaningful or at least interesting. I have become less restrictive in the things that I admire and the things that I do.

I used to restrict myself to what I think is acceptable by society. These days, I decide to follow my heart and just do what I am happy doing. I am following my philosophy in life more closely than before, I guess. "Be happy. As long as you are not hurting yourself or the people around you, you can't be wrong."

One of the things I've allowed myself to do is to buy some Mashimaro stuff! Yup, the current craze from Korea. See my updated Chamber of Images if you don't know what I am talking about.

Till the next development, you take care and stay happy!

Thoughts formed on 28 Oct 2001
Wow! It has been almost 6 months since I was last here. The last 6 months have been fulfilling ones. Work has been satisfying and got challenging after the Sep 11th incident in the USA. Business has reduced dramatically year on year by 25% so far with the month of October the hardest hit. Pay cut is a reality. So will be bonus forfeiture, it seems. Life goes on, as the saying goes.

I have a lot of good friends in the USA whom I've gotten to know as a result of my business travels and I immediately wrote them emails after learning about the terrible tragedy. They all wrote back and all are well. I am glad for that. However, I still feel extremely sad for all the families who lost loved ones in that incident. It was an atrocity beyond comprehension.

Now, I can only hope that the war against terror will be carried out effectively and efficiently. The world must bring their combined efforts to bear upon this. Otherwise, there will not be peace.

I understand that there are varying views on the matter and, with qaulifications, I agree that violence is not the answer to the many problems we face today. Violence is never the answer, or are there exceptions? In an instance where the perpetrator of violence is unwilling to stop his activities, do we advocate non- action and allow ourselves to be constant targets? There must come a time when we retaliate. This must be so when we are up against recalcitrant advocates of violence as the supposed solution to injustice they might suffer. This is especially so when the injustice can be and is being addressed through peaceful measures.

I have always said that we can agree to disagree. I have always believed that people are entitled to their own opinion. I have also said that a person's opinion is only an entitlement when it does not do harm to others. That is a social responsibility that we have as human beings.

Thoughts formed on 14 May 2001
Sorry for the long absence. Have been very very busy. This is the truth. Business has picked up substantially due to the improvement in the weather. My business is seasonal in nature and improves when the monsoon season ends. Can you guess what business I am in? Being cheeky here. Hahaha...

Also, I've been very stressed up with moving into my new home. It has taken forever to be ready and now, it is finally liveable. Yup. So, now I spend my evenings moving boxes and boxes of possessions to my new place. I have decided to throw away a lot of stuff.

I am sure you have had the same experience when you pack your stuff and thought of throwing away a lot of things and after looking through them, decided that you should keep them for sentimental reasons! I have the same problem now.

However, if I don't throw them away, I will have too much junk. That's what they are: sentimental junk. I have so much baggage from the past, so many memories. We all grow up, grow old and I guess should just let go of some things. Nostalgia: a sign of aging.

I have neglected many friends. Something that happens everytime I am busy. Whatever free time I have is so little. I am also giving up my part-time teaching stint so that I will have more time to myself and less stress in my life.

OK, nothing deep to say in this entry. Thanks for visiting and keep well!

Thoughts formed on 02 October 2000
The world is imperfect. How often have we heard this? Many times, no doubt. What does it mean? Simply, there are positivities and negativities in this world.

Depending on the time, place and people we find ourselves in and with, we might experience more positivities or more negativities. Also, sometimes, these positive or negative circumstances might last for a very long time.

Human beings, like all creatures, love what is positive. Prolonged stretches of time with abundance in positivities is probably heavenly. However, it blinds us to the existence of negativities and when circumstances take a turn for the worse, we are caught off-guard and very often, are at a lost as to what to do.

What can we do? We soldier on. Yup, it's that simple. Face the music and carry on with life. The trick, I guess, is to focus on what is positive in the negative. Or if we can't find that, cling on to something positive in the past or something positive that might happen in the future. This way, we might retain our sanity.

In an imperfect world, we have a choice. Do we want to focus on what is positive or do we want to focus on what is negative? Life is very short. Let's be positive about it.

Thoughts formed on 05 August 2000
You will read in this section something which I have firmly believed in for many years. I can't quite remember when was it that I thought about the issue and came up with this conclusion but it was when I was still in school. I think it was during my university days.

Now, why have I not posted this thought if it is something I have thought about so long ago? It has to do with the fact that it is about an institution and something that many people firmly believe in. It is possible that it will raise the ire of many who might read this entry.

I have finally decided to simply put it up and let you think about what I have to say. I believe that the idea is well thought out and is sensible from a purely utilitarian perspective. I understand that there are other perspectives which can be taken with the issue, like so many other issues in life, but that depends on your own philosophy as to how we should live our lives.

So, the matter has to do with "marriage". Yes, it's an institution. It is a social institution, a social construct. The question is if it is still relevant today.

I am inclined to believe that marriage is an outmoded social institution. I have said this on so many different occassions and to so many different groups of people. If two people truly love one another, they can be together forever without a piece of paper to bind them to each other.

The way I see it, marriage is really for the children. To give children legitimacy in a world of legal structures like ours, marriage is a necessary process. Of course, in Singapore, marriage also necessary if couples are to gain access to cheaper (notice that I do not say "cheap") housing from the State.

So, if a couple does not plan to have children and is reasonably well off to own a private property in which they can stay together, there is no need to get married.

Thoughts formed on 17 July 2000
Hello! How have you been? I am guessing that you are someone who enjoys reading my writings if you are here. You would have read my thoughts in the first Chamber of Retrospection, right? :-) Thank you very much for your support and I am very glad that you like my writings. Of course, I'm not sure that you like my thoughts but I'm sure we can agree to disagree.

Like I've said before, I would usually write only when I think there are things worthy of note to pen. However, I'm writing this time largely because I think I've not written anything for too long. Hmmm... is this noteworthy? I think this truly qualifies as a rambling thought? :)

I don't know why but I'm feeling rather light-hearted today. It's really quite rare since I'm a worrier. I don't think I'm a worrier by nature but after being in Singapore for 29 years (my entire life), I've learnt to be a worrier.

I am generally happy about being a Singaporean and staying in Singapore. Most of my friends are here. My family is here. All the things I own and treasure are here. I will never want to leave my country. (Fanfare!!!) Ahem.

The Singapore government has been very effective but sometimes resorted to controversial methods to achieve its aims. Much of the international community might criticise us for the way we do things which is understandable, since as human beings, we usually find methods unfamiliar to be rather uncomfortable, if not objectionable.

I do, however, worry about many things, staying in Singapore. I worry about my lifestyle and whether I will have enough to retire on. (This is something the government keeps telling people to be aware of and to plan ahead.) I worry about my career in future. I worry about my parents' health and possible costs of healthcare in future. Many worries are related directly or indirectly with money. I think it really has a large part to do with the nature of Singapore's society.

How much a person is worth is determined by how much he makes in dollar terms for many Singaporeans. Even though I disagree with that sentiment, I can see why people think that way. Immersed in a business environment (even the government is run like a business), we can't help but start to operate in a mode that requires us to think about the costs and benefits of every single decision we make in life. People who do not operate in such a mode might find themselves in financial hardship in future. That is the nature of our society.

Is this good or bad? Well, to be aware of the nature of our society and to recognise the values of our society is prudent. To work towards conforming to the values of our society is sensible. However, to be too single-minded about this is an illness. There are more important things in life than money. However, because money is tangible and manifestable, it becomes a convenient yardstick to measure almost anything in society.

Just like indulging in a drug, indulgence in the pursuit of money can become a dependency issue. Ultimately, it will destroy a person's sanity or so, I believe.

Thoughts formed on 22 April 2000
It has been more than 2 months since the last entry. Like my paper journal, I would usually write only when something occurs to me as noteworthy. I am not one to tie into a fixed routine for too long a period at any one time even though I do value stability in life which is promoted by having routines. I can be so contrary.

I'm sure everyone must have felt the feeling at some points in their lives. We seem to be happy with certain routines and happy with the ways our lives are progressing. However, we might just get the occassional urges to deviate, to go off the beaten track and find some adventure. I don't know about you but I'm like that.

The familiar is comforting and the familiar is something we will always return to in our search for solace. When people say they want to return to their roots, it's a very simple but poignant statement for me.

Be it my age or my personality, however, I need adventure from time to time. I need to feel alive in different ways. I enjoy the mystery and the magic of new experience. I bask in the knowledge that I can do new things well if I put my mind to it. Life is such a wonderful thing and this world is such a kaleidoscope of things to do.

However, I will always want to go back to what I am familiar with at the end of the day. I will always want to go back to a place I feel safe and a place I am familiar with.

Familiarity is comforting. However, familiarity can be boring. How we view familiarity depends on our frame of mind at that very moment, like so many other things in life. However, familiarity is definitely a need, not a want. Adventure, mystery and magic are wants. We need to understand this before we can fully appreciate life and find happiness.

Thoughts formed on 3 February 2000
Well, this is my first entry of the new millenium! Tadah! (Trumpets and ecstatic screams from the floor). OK, ok, I'm being sarcastic. :-) For those who know me, what's new? I have mellowed over the years and have become a lot milder in my speech. However, I still lack much of the wisdom which I think I need to make me a better person, using yardsticks of the majority in society, of course.

I guess I just don't understand what the big fuss with the new millenium was about. To me, it was just another new year and it wasn't anything that special. I didn't bother going out of the house to party till 3 AM in the morning. I didn't go crazy planning what to do so that when people ask me "What did you do on the eve of the new millenium?", I could say I did something really glamorous.

Now, don't get me wrong. If you were one of those who actually partied late and planned and did something really glamorous, good for you! It's just that I don't understand it, that's all. We're all made differently and we all have our own values which we live by. As usual, I stick by my philosophy in life: If you are not hurting anyone in doing what you are doing, there is no need to apologise for it!!!

What might be more important now is the upcoming Chinese New Year. Well, I don't know about you but it is definitely very important to many people I know. To me, it's just another great occassion to rest up and to spend time with my family, whom I love dearly but do not get to spend enough quality time with. It will be great!

What we have to realise really is that all of us have our beliefs even though we might be of the same race, same age group, same sex, same education background etc. However, there will always be differences in the way each one of us perceives things. Very often, quarrels break out amongst people because of the different perceptions we have about things. Why? Why should these incidents happen? It is because perception is reality.

Each of us hold our perceptions of our surroundings as the reality. Well, perceptions of the same surroundings by different people are, you're right, likely to be different. The sooner we realise that our differences with people around us very often is a matter of points of view, the easier it is for us to become tolerant and less egocentric people. We might disagree with what others have to say but we must accept their right to say it. Have I said this before? I think I have but some things cannot be overemphasised.

Let's hope the Year of the Dragon is a better one in every way for everyone.

Thoughts formed on 12 November 1999
It has been a long time since I penned any of my thoughts here. The same old excuse that I've been busy doesn't seem adequate anymore. Fact is I've grown lazy and I've developed other interests in life. Distractions might be a better word.

Well, life's been going on pretty much the same. I've been travelling and will be travelling more on business which is tiring but it gives me some time for a bit of R&R as well.

Basically, my life seems to be slowing down somewhat which might be good. I'm not so concerned with zooming from place to place, from one project to another, not so concerned about winning and losing as I was in the past. It might be a natural result in the process of aging or maybe, I'm just feeling tired.

Life's short and many things are beyond our control. The important thing is to live life in a way that will give us happiness and let other things take care of themselves. I would like to think that I've understood that and that I am practising that philosophy but I don't think I'm doing it 100% yet. There would be moments when I seem to be in that state of equanimity and moments when I lapse into human weaknesses and fall into depression.

I am inclined to believe that depression could be a luxury for people who are relatively well off without any worries in terms of finances or physical well-being. People like that tend to overplay their "deprivations" and think their problems bigger than they actually are. Compared to many suffering physically in the world, such depressed people should count themselves lucky. Of course, such an observation should include the author of these words as well.

We are constantly in search of happiness but happiness is something so transient that it deludes our best efforts to hold on to it, if we are to be so lucky as to find it in the first instance. Fortunate are the people who can be constantly happy. Wise are the people who are able to understand how to be constantly happy. I hope to be fortunate and wise one day.

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